Where does my JOY come from?

Before I tackle today's thoughts, I must tell you that my last post on school issues was a very vague VENT from me. I apologize. I know many of you reached out to me in concern, and THANK YOU for adding me to your prayer lists. However, I know that what I deal with is very little compared to so many others. I know that our own issues seem so big to US, but when looked at objectively, they are small potatoes. I am not excluded in having this issue. I think it is simply human.

The thoughts I have today have to do with a depressing article my husband sent me this morning. Here is the link:

http://finance.yahoo.com/tech-ticker/the-u.s.-middle-class-is-being-wiped-out-here's-the-stats-to-prove-it-520657.html?tickers=^DJI,^GSPC,SPY,MCD,WMT,XRT,DIA

After reading this little gem of optimisim, I started thinking about where my joy comes from, because, let's face it, if we are going to be shoved to the poor side of the demographic, then I can't count on my mini-trips, family outings, conventions, and shopping days as a source of joy for me. It is scary to think about the things that make me happy. Most of them involve spending a certain amount of money. I think we have all seen or heard about joyfull people who have little to nothing of monetary value. However, would that work for us who go from having funds to not having any.

The one joyful thing that I know I will always have (and hope to teach my children to always KNOW) is GOD. He is always there. His promises are still the same promises in feast and famine. He is the great provider giving us more than fish and bread but a real hope to live on! The happiness and joy would have to come from having the real fruit of the spirit. LOVE * JOY * PEACE * PATIENCE * KINDNESS * GOODNESS * GENTLENESS * FAITHFULLNESS * SELF-CONTROL How wonderful to know that we can have this fruit no matter where we are in our lives just by staying connected to GOD!

Politics ~ UGH!!!!!!!!!

I have spent a big part of my day trying to work things out for Gabbie's 4th grade year. She has struggled academically since kindergarten. She has some learning disabilities. I will share more about that in another post. No child is perfect and don't let anyone ever tell you otherwise!!!

Dealing with the public schools on my child's behalf has been very difficult to say the least. I have been pushed to the side in a very sneaky way for 4 years!!! I think that I handle things very diplomatically, but I am starting to see why some parents go to the overly assertive approach. Then there are those kids that don't have an advocate at all. What about them? If I spin in place being assertive, what happens to those kids who have no one. It is frustrating.

I rarely ask for anything in hopes that when I really needs something for my kids, they will see that I am not a controlling whiner and complainer. I don't know what to do next.

PRAY ~ done
Cry ~ done that
home school ~ tried that
private school ~ problems could be the same!

UGH!!!!!! Just let us make it through Lord! AMEN!

good kids vs bad kids

Just when I thought my parenting efforts were completely amiss due to seeing little fruits of my labor, I get served breakfast in bed by my 10 yr old. She brought me coffee/hot tea and toast. She also stole her momma's trick and wrote a message to me on my napkin. It was the best breakfast I have ever eaten. I kept asking myself why it felt that way. It was because she did something for someone else out of the goodness of her well intentioned heart!!!! That is what I want my kids to grow up to be I have decided. If they grow up wanting to serve others in love, then I will God's blessing on our obedience. My kids aren't good and obedient all day everyday, but they still have sweet soft hearts. With God's help that purity and preciousness can be preserved. So here's to us mothers and fathers keeping the eye on the prize (i.e. good kids = great Godly adults).

CHORE TIME

I am keeping it real here today in this blog. I am failing at consistency here at home. A domestic DIVA I am NOT!! Please do not inundate me with information about how wonderfully organized your chore schedule is at home! I know many wonderful tips and ideas. REALLY! The failure is not a result of ignorance on my part. I think it is because of laziness?? It is a lot of work to create, implement, and stay consistent with a chore policy. It also means excepting less than perfect work (childlike work), facing arguments and whines, and straight-up self-discipline from me!! Overall, it is the age old battle of instant gratification vs long term benefits at work here. AND, let's face it, I NEED HELP AROUND HERE.

Now that all that is out there about my failings and short comings as a homemaker, I plan to tackle this problem. I WANT long term benefits. I need to slide my ol' selfish self on over and make room for creating disciplined creatures of society. 3 of them to be exact!

GAME PLAN???? In the past dysfunctional me has used the job jar which consists of 10 jobs that any of my children can do. The deal WAS they draw and do 1 job per day as part of earning there keep in this family. If they ever wanted to earn extra $, they could get $1 for each additional chore that they complete to mommy's satisfaction. We have not done that everyday, and when they do draw. There is a lot of drama about what they draw. Therefore, I think we need something more concrete and visual. So they know what to expect each day and can operate it without hours of drama and negotiations with momma.

I am in awe of all of you moms out there that have this down to a fine art. I will never be there, but I will keep trying.

Stay Tuned for when I get this operation up and going! I hope that this blog will help keep me accountable to it as well.

HERO DEVO ~ Day 3

I hope you all forgive the roughness of these.  I am sure they might be a grammatical nightmare. They are written quickly but with lots of heart and good intentions!  THANKS!

          A Drop in the Ocean

Do you ever feel like what you do isn’t worth doing?  LIKE, why bother???  Honestly, I feel that almost every day.  Why bother making the beds or sweeping the floors no one really notices but me, and they are messy again with the hour!  Why bother counting the calories?  Why bother buying the cream cheese brand that is 50cents cheaper?  Does it really matter?  Does it really add up?  There are so many ways to feel discouraged if we lose our focus. 

Reading John 6: 1-13 again makes me see these things in a new way!!!!

 ¹Some time after this, Jesus crossed to the far shore of the Sea of Galilee (that is, the Sea of Tiberias), ²and a great crowd of people followed him because they saw the miraculous signs he had performed on the sick. ³Then Jesus went up on a mountainside and sat down with his disciples.⁴The Jewish Passover Feast was near.

 ⁵When Jesus looked up and saw a great crowd coming toward him, he said to Philip, "Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?" ⁶He asked this only to test him, for he already had in mind what he was going to do.
 ⁷Philip answered him, "Eight months' wages^[a] would not buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!"
 ⁸Another of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter's brother, spoke up, ⁹"Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?"
 ¹⁰Jesus said, "Have the people sit down." There was plenty of grass in that place, and the men sat down, about five thousand of them. ¹¹Jesus then took the loaves, gave thanks, and distributed to those who were seated as much as they wanted. He did the same with the fish.
 ¹²When they had all had enough to eat, he said to his disciples, "Gather the pieces that are left over. Let nothing be wasted." ¹³So they gathered them and filled twelve baskets with the pieces of the five barley loaves left over by those who had eaten.

Jesus can take a no name boy’s meager offerings that might feed a couple of people and makes it MORE THAN ENOUGH for 5 Thousand.  So, he can take your “WHY BOTHER” situations and turn them into real miracles!  After all, here Jesus is in real SUPERHERO form!!!  But, I love seeing it as he turned this boy’s mere drop in the bucket to exponential blessing and abundance.
There are so many ways this translates into our lives today.  GOD can take and turn the home blessings we do into so many blessings and abundance for HIS glory and our amazement!!!  HOW COOL!!
What are some ways that you feel like you merely scratch the surface so why bother????
Maybe you feel that way about teaching these children at VBS or during Sunday School?  Can you imagine the ways he can grow your offerings in service to him?  GOD IS TRULY AMAZING!  HE is THE SUPERHERO!

HERO DEVO ~ DAY 2

Here's today's devotion:

Thank YOU FOR joining me this morning!

Isn’t it so exciting to be talking about Jesus to these children this week?  You may be the very people they remember when they think of these scriptures or lessons when they are adults!!  I still remember some of my past VBS and Sunday School teachers and what they taught!  Have no doubt you are making an impact!

Today we are looking at………………..

The ROMAN Centurion: A HERO BY FAITH

Do you have a personal story of great faith in your life?

Have you given your last $’s in your wallet to a mission or the church, and wondered how your next grocery trip would be covered?

Have you felt a total mind and soul connection while worshiping GOD knowing there is no doubt in his Holy Spirit in you? 

Have you prayed and seen the results of those prayers and knew without a doubt they were a result of God’s power working through you?

I really wish we had time to share stories!!!  I bet you all have some great ones!!

Let’s read an amazing example of pure and solid faith.

Let’s read Matthew 8: 5-13

The Faith of the Centurion  5When Jesus had entered Capernaum, a centurion came to him, asking for help. 6"Lord," he said, "my servant lies at home paralyzed and in terrible suffering."  7Jesus said to him, "I will go and heal him."  8The centurion replied, "Lord, I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. But just say the word, and my servant will be healed. 9For I myself am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this one, 'Go,' and he goes; and that one, 'Come,' and he comes. I say to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does it."  10When Jesus heard this, he was astonished and said to those following him, "I tell you the truth, I have not found anyone in Israel with such great faith.  11I say to you that many will come from the east and the west, and will take their places at the feast with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven. 12But the subjects of the kingdom will be thrown outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth." New International Version (NIV) Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by Biblica

13Then Jesus said to the centurion, "Go! It will be done just as you believed it would." And his servant was healed at that very hour. New International Version (NIV)

The Centurion was a ROMAN OFFICER in charge of 100 soldiers.  He was a GENTILE of position.  His heroics weren’t in the way of his job as an officer in the Roman army but in the way he approached Jesus with full and total faith in WHO JESUS was and WHAT Jesus could do.   He knew that Jesus was a straight connection to GOD and was bold in going straight to HIM with his compassionate plea.  Not only that, but he believed with such conviction that he asked Jesus to just say the word instead of coming to the sick man’s bedside.  The Centurion’s BOLD and PURE faith saw beyond the circumstances and JESUS’ power over circumstances.  He was a hero who saw the real power in Jesus. 

Instead of Jesus responding, “who are you, sinner, coming to ME, GOD IN THE FLESH, to help your suffering servant?”, he marveled at his faith.  JESUS MARVELED at the Centurions faith. He was so struck by the gentile’s faith that he spoke to the Jews letting them know how important it is to have this great faith!

We should not be afraid or feel unworthy to go straight to God.  He was the sacrificial lamb so we could do just that!  HE made our unworthiness worthy.

The curtain came down giving us direct access to HIM. 

When Jesus died on the cross the curtain of the temple was split in two, symbolizing the removal of the barrier between us and God.

MATT: 27:51

At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. 

 Only the high priest was permitted to pass beyond this veil once each year (Exodus 30:10; Hebrews 9:7) to enter into God's presence for all of Israel and make atonement for their sins (Leviticus 16).

Let’s be heroes by taking full advantage of that access.  Let’s be heroes with our FAITH!!!!

VBS ~ Teacher DEVO from DAY 1

I thought I would share the devotions that I am giving to the VBS teachers this week at HERO HEADQUARTERS.  Here is Day 1:

LUKE 2: 8-20

⁸And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch 
over their flocks at night. ⁹An angel of the Lord appeared to them, 
and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. 
¹⁰But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news 
of great joy that will be for all the people. ¹¹Today in the town of David 
a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ^[a] the Lord. ¹²This will be a
 sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger."

 ¹³Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel,
 praising God and saying, 

 ¹⁴"Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."

 ¹⁵When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said 
 to one another, "Let's go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord    has told us about."

 ¹⁶So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was
 lying in the manger. ¹⁷When they had seen him, they spread the word
 concerning what had been told them about this child, ¹⁸and all who heard
 it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. ¹⁹But Mary treasured 
up all these things and pondered them in her heart. ²⁰The shepherds 
returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen,
 which were just as they had been told.

The shepherds weren’t larger than life heros.  They were
 just everyday hard working men who were obedient to God. 

God’s love is communicated in big ways through all 
of us unpolished, frantically busy, sleep deprived,
average everyday people!!!  The angel came to the YOU & ME’s
and NOT the priests, CEOS, high officials, Billy Grahams,
 Joyce Meyers. 

Here is what is HUGE.  What these everyday men of God 
saw and reported perpetuated the good news of JESUS 
CHRIST!  Luke 2:18 “and all who heard it were amazed….”

So here are so interesting thoughts about the shepherds.

I wondered why them???  Don’t you.  What I did find is that 
these shepherds were most likely the ones raising the 
sacrificial lambs.  The very ones used in the temple
 for forgiveness of sins.  How appropriate for it to be them 
that see the LAMB OF GOD. 

Another wonderful thing to note is the emotions of the 
Shepherds through this experience.  Oh how I think we can
 relate to them on this one!!! 

When the angel appeared and spoke and told them what
they would find, they were terrified!!!  However they were 
obedient and learned that all they had seen and heard
were exactly as they had been told.  Because of this they
were glorifying and praising GOD. 

Likewise, we might get scared when God is calling us
to do something new, difficult, or uncomfortable.  But, 
when we find ourselves to be obedient to his calling, we 
end up fully blessed glorifying and praising GOD!!!  AMEN?

SO MY HERO FRIENDS……..BE OBEDIENT AND TAKE ACTION!

Neurotic Dependency

Today I want to share with you some comments made by author Eugene Peterson that I found in a study I am currently doing.  I think there is so much to think about in these comments!  I find something new every time I read them.  I hope you find them as relevant.

"But if we are not to be proud, clamorous, arrogant persons, what are we to be?  Mousy,cringing, insecure ones?  Well, not quite.  Having realized the dangers of pride, the sin of thinking too much of ourselves, we are suddenly in danger of another mistake, thinking too little of ourselves.  There are some who conclude that since the great Christian temptation is to try to be everything, the perfect Christian solution is to be nothing.  And so we have the problem of the doormat Christian and the dishrag saint: the person upon whom everyone walks and wipes their feet, the person who is used by others to clean up the mess of everyday living and then is discarded.  These people then compensate for their poor lives by weepily clinging to God, hoping to make up for the miseries of everyday life by dreaming of luxuries in heaven. Christian faith is not neurotic dependency but childlike trust. We do not have a God who forever indulges our whims but a God whom we trust with our destinies."

These are thoughts that expand on Psalm 131:1.

     LORD, my heart is not proud;
    my eyes are not haughty. 
    I do not get involved with things
    too great or too difficult for me. 




Don't you love it!?!?!  

Out of the Game!

I just feel like hiding in a hole today.  Do you ever have those days where the world is just a little too much and letting it go on without you for a day sounds like a fabulous idea?  I think it is ok to bench yourself every once in a while.  So consider me "benched" for the day!  I am only sad that the bench isn't on a sandy beach in Fiji.  Maybe next time.

Marriage

Today is our 14th wedding anniversary! I was 20 when I got married. Chad was 22. We thought we knew exactly what we were doing at the time. But, I look back at how much I have learned over the years and get frightened thinking about how little we really knew about life. God knew what HE was doing; we did not.

Chad is the one God had planned for me, and I am so thankful for him now. We have been through a lot together and know how to work with each other and not against each other. I know we have a lot more to learn. We pray for God's guidance and protection over the rest of our lives together.

Looking out for number.........six?

Hi everyone!

Well, my thoughts for today could be considered controversial by many of you. Oh how I wish we could all sit and have a big girl talk with this one!!! I am calling out what I see as a huge mixed message that Christian women today are receiving from every direction!! It has to do with where we as women stand in the priorities of our lives........taking care of ourselves and our needs and desires vs the J(jesus first) O(others 2nd) Y(you last). Do you see the contradiction???

If you turn on Dr. Phil or The Today Show, you will be bombarded with the message of take care of yourself first so you can be better at taking care of all the loved ones in your life. That does make total sense!! After all, give me a spa weekend, a good therapist, and plenty of girl time with my friends, and I do feel rested and happy! However, at this point in my journey as a mother, doing these things often means missing something in my life as a servant to GOD and others. This message I am hearing from these media sources is that you need to put yourself FIRST in order to be the best you can be!

Why are they saying this?? Because women out there are depressed, overweight, turning to daily cocktail times and prescription drugs, and just plain unhappy!! So, what does the secular world tell us to do about that??? Put ourselves first?

We can lead ourselves down a very destructive path is the message we are giving ourselves daily is, "I have 3 kids, so I deserve __________". Really?? What do we deserve? We are sad sinners that are what we are by God's amazing mercy and grace. Everything we receive is a gift! What about what Jesus says about our priorities? It is actually the total opposite. I THINK what He says is the ticket to happiness. Don't you?

Matthew 22:³⁶"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" ³⁷Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. ³⁸This is the first and greatest commandment. ³⁹And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself. ⁴⁰All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."

Galatians 5:13
You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature ; rather, serve one another in love.

Ephesians 6:7
Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men,

The biggest lesson I have learned over the last couple of weeks is that obedience equals blessings! It is really hard to believe sometimes, but I am now a believer. If we put God first, serve others, and then take care of ourselves, we will be living a life full of abundant blessings!!! That means giving up things that our obstructing a divine relationship with Him, and that means getting your priorities in order!

I am SO not saying that we should not take time out for ourselves, but perhaps it should be done at the end of the day when God says to us, "well done good and faithful servant"? Or perhaps it is done by spending that time with God in Christian fellowship while at the spa? Hey aren't we women the queens of multitasking?

As for me, I will try to keep looking out for #6 (God, husband, kid 1, kid 2, kid 3, me=#6) and not forget who the real #1 is!

Is Summer Over Yet?

Okay, I am feeling desperate to get on mentally solid ground with the kids this summer. It is hard getting asked, "what are we doing today," or "what are we doing tomorrow," or "can I have a friend over" every 5 seconds!!! It is also hard to hear all the food needs, whines, and complaints. I know they are growing children, but do they REALLY need to eat every 30 minutes? It may be cheaper to send them to the Boys and Girls Club after-all!! I really just want to keep my sanity by hiding in my bedroom, but I feel like that might be setting a bad example. I am not sure I am a good activities director, because I keep hearing myself say, "JUST GO PLAY". What does a good stay-at-home summertime mom do? Well......

• she gets up an hour before the kids do everyday and makes them a wonderful nourishing breakfast full of fresh fruits and grains!
• she has a large written out schedule with each days activities and plans hanging up and refers to that during said breakfast.
• she organizes and joins in on all activities.
• she has included chore time and learning time for the kids during this schedule.
• she lets the kids help make lunch.
• she bakes goodies with them at least once a week.
• she doesn't yell or lose her patients with them.
• she finds joy in every moment with her kids.
• she hears how loved and wonderful she is from her kids constantly.

OKAY, is this you?? NO PRESSURE! I am sure I am forgetting some things too!! I am reminded of one of my favorite quotes by Dr. Kevin Leman, "You just have to be a good parent to raise great kids". So, maybe hiding in my bedroom for a short period each day is acceptable?? I hope so!

Delighting in the Ordinary

One of my favorite Christian authors and speakers is Juli Ann Barnhill! Have you heard of her? She wrote "She's Gonna Blow" as well as other great mommy books! In one of her talks, she tells moms how important it is to delight in the ordinary. Just think about that for a moment! That is something that has resonated with me for the last 3 years. I have struggled with expecting perfection from my imperfect kids. My 1st born doesn't make straight A's by no fault of her but because a learning disability. OUCH. My son is SHY which means playing ball is overwhelming to him. OUCH. My youngest throws fits in public STILL. OUCH. Anyways, you get my point. So, daily I remind myself that I MUST delight in the ordinary things to stay sane and in a joyful place in my life as a mother. It is great if my son makes his bed by putting the comforter on horizontally instead of vertically. At least he made the effort! It is okay if we don't have any areas of olympic qualifying abilities. We are just trying to find our way to the talents and purposes that God has planned for us. It just takes some of us longer than others......... maybe even a lifetime. In the meantime, I will delight in the ordinary, and if something extraordinary happens along the way, we will really celebrate!

Here is the story I love so much that inspired today's thoughts:

WELCOME TO HOLLAND

by
Emily Perl Kingsley.

c1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

DELUSIONAL WOMAN!!

Well, we are back from our family vacation. I must say................I went into this vacation with the TOTALLY wrong mindset. My selfishness struck again. It is so true that we set ourselves up with unrealistic expectations over and over again as moms. Don't ya think??

While getting ready for this trip, I would share with folks that my hope for the trip was to lie pool side with a good book and a yummy beverage and bask in nothingness! UMMMM! YEAH RIGHT!! Did I think I had a nanny coming along or something?? Yes, I am delusional! Admitting my problem is the first step to being cured right?

Instead, I should have said that I was going on this trip with the expectation of playing with my kids, watching daddy play with my kids, and having fun together as a family. WE DID DO THAT!

I can't help but feel some sadness about the quiet pool-time and book reading that didn't happen, but that is for another trip another time. FOR THIS IS MY SEASON and the time for this SEASON is now.

I wonder what other areas of my life that selfishness has taken a stronghold. Where else am I not dying to myself?? Oh, there are lots I fear!

Proverbs 31:15

¹⁵She rises also while it is still night
And gives food to her household
And portions to her maidens.

disciplined

communication

Okay, I am blogging today to make up for missed days this week. I can't BELIEVE how busy this summer has already been! We were at the pool everyday this week for swim team practice and swimming lessons for the wee ones. My children have evolved into FISH!

I have heard lots of folks talking about communication breakdowns in marriages and family situations lately, so my thoughts today pertain to that! The most GENIUS thing I have learned in the last few years is the 5 Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapmen!!! We have had The Purpose Driven Life, The Prayer of Jabez, Wild at Heart, and many other books and studies that have been wildly popular over the last decade and rightfully so! However, the one I apply to my life the most is the love languages. At the end of the day, life application is where it is at!! Won't you agree?

Learning my husband's love language is instrumental in predicting what he wants and needs from me which leads him to feel as loved as he can in our marriage. That being said, I still fail a lot of the time at meeting those needs. However, being aware of them makes things better than they would be otherwise! I truly believe that. For example, when we were first married, I worried constantly about making sure dinner was ready, keeping the house picked up, and ironing his clothes. I would get really frustrated when he didn't seem to notice or care when I did those things!!! Well, here is why...........His primary love language is NOT acts of service it is quality time; FURTHERMORE, mine is WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT.

I am embarrassed about words of encouragement being mine. It sounds like it means I need to be praised constantly and doing things is about getting that praise! As a Christian, I know I don't do things for that reason. I think it is more about words effecting me and resonating with me more than they would for someone of a different language. I am a wordy! I love to talk and listen and banter and things really do sink in with me. That is my defense for my embarrassing LL! LOL!

Then there is the love languages of our children that must be learned for better communication purposes. What a cool thing to do! If you are like me, your home is NOT always the peaceful serene place your heart so desires. Let's face it......... when you have kids, there is DRAMA. I have been blessed with 3 sensitive children, and how I handle 1 child does NOT work for the other 2. Parenting is hard, and I truly believe knowing their individual love languages helps everyone.

In short, learn your family members love language. If you work closely with people, learn your co-workers love language. You may stop making Sally cry and you may gain a new close bond with someone that you clashed with before!!!

Here are the quizzes:

http://www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/love/

encouraging words

I remember Beth Moore saying in her study on Esther: We were born for such a time as this. This is actually what is said of Queen Esther in the book of Esther. She was born for such a time as that. I SO LOVE THAT. When we start hitting hard times in our lives or when things change suddenly on us, we should keep in mind that we were born FOR SUCH A TIME AS THIS!!!! God has a plan for us no matter how small and insignificant we feel! Every spill we clean, every back we rub, every throw-up mess we deal with in the middle of the night, are all done for a greater good and for HIS glory. For we were born for such a time as this!!!! I hope that is a little encouragement for all of you today.

"Who knows but that you were born for such a time as this?" and so she answers: "...I will go to the king even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish" (Esther 4:14).

Keeping it Real

Just when I think my kids are getting nice and big and past certain issues we have an incident like we did last night. We were swimming at the pool with our longtime dear friends at a local pool. We were all having a great time until it was time to go. My youngest who is 5 decides to start crying loudly and loses all ability to function simply because it is time to go. She throws this fit for the 20 + minutes it takes us to pack up and get out to the car. This happened only an hour after I had just told my friend how Haylie was my easiest kid. This tantrum was just Haylie keeping it real!

See the picture below..................................

Day 2

As my 3 children run around pestering each other with loud feet and LOUD voices, I am wondering how I am going to be able to write this blog with any real concentration this summer.

Questions to ponder...............

Will NOT getting a career now desperately hurt my chances of ever getting one down the road?

Do I really worry about what other people think of me if I am just a stay at home mom while they are all in school?

Will I be able to keep some sort of happiness and internal satisfaction staying home?

What am I teaching my children if I have a college degree but don't use it?

I think the answer to these questions has to do with my identity in CHRIST ALONE. Who does He say that I am and should be and what pleases HIM. I am often reminded of this verse:

“If anyone wants to become my follower, he must deny himself, take up his cross daily, and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it.”

Jesus in Luke 9:23-24

The truth is that going back to work may be for the selfish me and may not involve denying myself and taking up the cross at all. The hard thing for me, in so many ways, would be to continue to stay home, but everything I do here at home is for Jesus and leading my children to a relationship with him.

But is it really right if I fail at every turn????

Okay, so staying home is probably the right thing. So tomorrow we can look at ways to do it without going insane? Or ways to be encouraged by that role?

Okay, I hear lots of banging and crashing going on upstairs. I think I better stop for today and engage with the children before there isn't a house left to engage in.

My inner secret just for you is that I need to figure out how to be happy staying at home and feel like I am enough and like it is enough for me. ANYONE RELATE?? ANYONE?

AND!!!! I do know that I am blessed to have a choice!

DAY ONE

I have decided to start a blog as a tool to navigate my personal journey through motherhood phase 2! I am calling phase 1: infancy - preschool years and phase 2: school aged years. I will worry about the next phase later! I am entering the sea of phase 2 and I am on a new boat with all new controls! Which way do I go, and what button will get me there? MAYDAY!

I am sure many of you can relate to the stage I am at now. My youngest child Haylie will begin kindergarten in the fall leaving me to ponder my place in this world. That sounds SO DRAMATIC! Honestly, it feels dramatic (or traumatic). When my first of 3 children was born, my husband Chad and I had clear thoughts and a clear purpose. In fact, it was very black and white for my husband and myself; I am and will remain a STAY AT HOME MOM. That seemed to be what the Lord said to us. I never dreamed I would feel this wavering and unsure position that I am in now; this new boat. My heavenly navigator is giving me directions, but I am not sure I am hearing them yet.

As a Christian, I feel that I need to go back to my roots and remember the thoughts and reasonings behind being a stay at home mom that committed us to that long term path in the beginning. It was necessary at first. After all, there would be daycare expenses, bonding and nurturing during those "formative years", and flexibility when it came too illnesses and doctor's visits. All logical and important reasons. There was also my heart and its desires to be where God was calling me to be which was with my babies.

But, none of those reasons work for me now expect God is still calling me to be with my children. So, I want to write this blog DAILY as a learning process for myself and anyone else in, near, or around MY BOAT! HOP ON. Let's REDISCOVER why MOTHERING is ENOUGH! I hope you will be able to come here and feel encouraged, enlightened, and maybe have a little "I am so glad I am not alone" moments along the way.